Thoughts on confidence

Read this article today:  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-bloom/how-to-talk-to-little-gir_b_882510.html?ref=fb&src=sp

My knee-jerk reaction was to agree with it 100%.  After all, girls are so much more than clothes, make-up, and hair.  We are intelligent, willful, individualized creatures.  We have interests, ideas, dreams, and responsibilities.  And yet, it seems every ice breaker, especially with little girls, is "what a cute dress!" or "what pretty hair!" or "you're just adorable!"  And one simply cannot get angry at a genuine compliment.  Although, after the 800th "she's so cute" I do sometimes want to scream "she's more than CUTE!".

But I kept thinking on this subject throughout the day.  You, as an adolescent girl, will be bombarded.  And to be honest, there is little I can do to stop it.  The media is everywhere.  Even in schools now.  And there is no avoiding the biggest cause of self-consciousness - other adolescent girls.  So, if I know there's no protecting you, shouldn't I help to arm you?  At the end of the day, I want you to know you're beautiful.  I want you to walk around everyday knowing that you are gloriously built, from your head to your toes.  I don't want you to ever look in a magazine, see a tv ad, or even look at another girl and even momentarily second-guess yourself.

So there's a balance somewhere, yes?  I tell you everyday how beautiful you are, and then immediately remind you that you are more than beautiful?  Sounds confusing, although I think that's the basic answer.  I think at the end of the day, my goal is to help give you more self-confidence than I ever had growing up.  And to help you understand how to love yourself as much as I love you.

So, Lily... you are beautiful.  And you go far beyond that beauty.  But, you're still beautiful.

Home again, home again , jiggity jig.

You tantrumed your way to sleep tonight.  For some reason, ever since we got back from vacation, you've had trouble sleeping in your crib.  However, tonight I put my foot down and reclaimed my bed for my own.  A necessary evil of being a mommy, I suppose.  Tomorrow you will have forgotten all about it, and will be smiley and giggly in the morning. 

So you've finally met all of your Aunts, Uncles, and cousins.  Dear God, did you have a great time.  And really, so did I.  It was so hard to leave, not only all of my family, but that beautiful open sky and clean air.  At first it was odd, being back "home".  Nothing was as I remembered it.  The area had grown and developed.  And while it certainly was no north jersey, it held it's own.  But the longer I stayed, the more familiar and comfortable my surroundings became.  I guess a part of me will always miss it.  But I returned to Northern New Jersey in a funk... sad to be back to a loud, crowded, polluted state and a disheveled house.  I've mostly kicked it, but it lingers a bit.  Especially when you want to go on a walk.

Maybe someday we can get out of this god-foresaken state and this god-foresaken house.